Letter to Sanity

My dear Sanity,

Please don’t be offended that it has taken me so long to contact you. It really has been too long since we last spoke, but with every passing moment it seemed harder to reach you. Now that I’ve finally scraped up the courage to write this letter, I want to be perfectly honest with you. I never meant for us to wholly part ways, but sometimes your views on things were just so overwhelmingly and impeccably sane that it made me feel like running around in circles, waving my hat and shouting “palimpalimpalim”, if only to make sure I’m not losing touch with the madder side of things. I know that you mean well, but I just can’t face being trapped in a live full of truths, natural law, scientific proof and exorbitant expectation.

But despite these enormous differences of opinions, views, and lifestyles, somehow I just can’t forget you. I miss your cold, overbearing rationality and even though I could never help trying to look beyond that fence you created in your mind, I also cherish the memory of an illusion of safety inside these boundaries of your imagination. I acknowledge your need to calculate and predict behavior, but there simply must be a way to accommodate for love, foolishness and mental mentality as well.

Since our dispute (and I gladly admit to having said things that I shouldn’t have said) I’ve been thinking a lot. And I can’t help but find that your point of view might hint towards a certain kind of helplessness towards a life that overwhelms with uncountable possibilities. Just imagine what life could be like, if you would just allow yourself to let go of all the boundaries you’ve formed in your head over the years. Just imagine being able to fully enjoy a moment of bliss without having to overthink all the possible outcomes and consequences. Just imagine how it could feel if you would free yourself to the insane infinity of unpredictable and unfathomable adventures that is life!

I realise that my reaching out to you comes very unexpected, but I need you to know that I have decided to leave the country and start a new life elsewhere. I wouldn’t dare to hope that you could wish to join me in this endeavour? If you could find it in yourself to try to strike a compromise between left and right, fear and courage, up and down, low and lower, holly and ivy and poison and wine, then all will be fine! I promise! If you’re prepared to expect the unexpected, think the unthinkable and do the undoable, I would be absolutely thrilled to take on this journey with me. Together we shall eff the ineffable and we will be exactly where we need to be.

Don’t stop me now, for tomorrow I’ll be gone. I shall wait for you behind the second star to the right to turn left after the sun and together we will carry on straight until the morning….

Please don’t let me down!

Yours, always.

Vanity Vanitas

exorbitant expectations.
exorbitant expectations.
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